Moving out of your parents’ home sounds like the ultimate liberation—no curfews, no random nagging, and finally, a whole place to yourself. But beyond the perks of freedom, living on your own is a crash course in adulting that nobody prepares you for, until you’ve experienced it firsthand.
From navigating monthly expenses to emotional growing pains, here are 6 hard truths fellow homeowners and renters have learnt along the way.
Writer’s note: responses have been edited for clarity.
Steep learning curve starts once you move out
Image credit: @annclarissa on Lemon8
Moving out for the first time can feel like being thrown straight into the deep end of adulthood. There’s a steep learning curve when you first move out, whether you’re buying or renting—starting with the daunting task of sifting through listings that fit both your wishlist and budget, or figuring out HDB policies.
Once you’ve locked in a place, the next reality check comes in the form of paperwork—an unavoidable but essential part of the process. For first-time renters, it often begins with breaking down rental agreement clauses and understanding your rights as a tenant. You won’t always know the true condition of a unit until you’ve moved in, so protecting yourself with clear agreements and proper documentation is key.
Similarly, the learning continues for new homeowners. Figuring out financing options can be overwhelming, and if you’re starting with a blank canvas, there are numerous renovation decisions to make before your place starts feeling like home.
Even shopping for furniture and appliances involves some trial and error. That stylish sofa might end up less comfy than it looks, or the washing machine you bought could turn out way too small for your laundry load. It’s only through these missteps that you figure out what suits your space and lifestyle best.
Lesson learnt from moving out:
“Living in the house is the only way to find out which pieces of furniture you actually need, and the corners of the house you REALLY need to change and not just WANT to change.” – @smolhappybean on Lemon8
Hidden costs can quickly add up
Image credit: CPF
Beyond rent or mortgage payments, your monthly expenses tend to balloon once you factor in costs such as hidden rental costs, BTO expenses, and recurring fees like town council service and conservancy charges.
Groceries and household essentials that your parents once magically replenished are now fully on your tab. A stocked fridge used to be something you took for granted, but now you’re stretching every dollar to keep up with these daily essentials.
And if there’s 1 adulting tip you take away, let it be this: building an emergency fund. It’s essential for cushioning any surprises, such as rent increases or urgent repairs. You’ll thank yourself for setting aside the extra buffer to tide you through bumps in your moving-out journey.
Lesson learnt from moving out:
“I set up standing orders that direct my monthly salary into recurring bills and rent, and only spend the remaining amount on day-to-day items. It’s also important to have some emergency savings so that you have something to fall back on, should anything happen.” – @kimotherapyy on Lemon8
Adulting will hit you hard
Image credit: @surenlowenhouse & @steigensingapore
Having full autonomy over your living situation brings more freedom—you’ll get to decide how your new home looks, host guests whenever you want, and plan grocery runs on your terms. But with great freedom comes great responsibilities, especially when there’s no one else to pick up the slack.
Now, you’re the designated adult for everything, from cooking your meals and tackling your daily chores to figuring out what to do when your aircon starts leaking at 2am.
It’s not just about keeping your home from turning into a pigsty—you’ll also need the financial discipline to stay on top of rent, utilities, and other recurring bills. Managing your money wisely becomes non-negotiable, and you might need to sacrifice non-essential purchases to ensure that you can cover the costs of moving out.
Lesson learnt from moving out:
“Things that I usually don’t have to think about suddenly became something I had to be mindful of. They came in the form of very minute things—how to turn on the electricity in my house, how to contact PUB to turn on the water, and how to deal with grocery shopping planning. These were just some small instances that I felt were the true markers of adulthood.” – @ohmycrumpets on Lemon8
Improved family relationships
Image credit: Nalau Nobel on Unsplash
Interestingly, moving out can improve the relationship between you and your family members. With physical distance comes emotional breathing room, and you might find yourself looking forward to weekly dinners or appreciating your parents in ways you didn’t before.
They may even start treating you like a “full-fledged” adult now that you’re out of the house—giving you more respect, space, and maybe even a few life tips. There might even be more common topics to chat about, like how they navigated moving out back in their day and the parallels between your experiences and theirs.
Lesson learnt from moving out:
“While living at home, conflicts with parents or siblings over trivial matters can arise. However, since moving out, our relationship has significantly improved. We now make an effort to meet at least once a week and cherish our time together, focusing solely on the positive aspects of our relationship. This has led to a healthier family dynamic.” – @happybubblegun on Lemon8
Be patient with yourself throughout the process
The first few months will feel chaotic as you get used to a new environment and settle into your new space. When the novelty wears off and the responsibilities start to pile up, you might even start second-guessing your decision to move out.
It’ll take time before a new space starts to feel like home, especially if you’re still figuring out how to live with a partner or roommates. That’s where a support system really helps. Whether it’s friends helping you unpack or family checking in to see how you’re coping, those small gestures go a long way in making the transition smoother.
As the days go by and you start to settle into your daily routine, you’ll start to feel more confident tackling life on your own. The independence doesn’t come easy, but it’s worth it.
Lesson learnt from moving out:
“Stay open-minded and embrace the new experiences and challenges that come with living independently! It is completely normal to encounter challenges along the way, but what we found really helpful was a mindset change—treat each challenge as an opportunity for growth and learning!” – @fixmypapercut on Lemon8
Moving out can come with emotional baggage
Image credit: @yeohaus.myhaus on Lemon8
Leaving your family home—along with the childhood memories that come with it—can feel heavier than you’d expect. If you’re the only child or have ageing parents, that move might come with a side of guilt, like you’re leaving them behind.
That’s why regular check-ins and quality time become even more meaningful once you’ve moved out. Whether it’s going back for dinner or dropping by to visit, these small gestures can help to maintain that bond between you and your family.
If you’re living alone, it can feel isolating without the built-in social interaction that comes with being around family. The peace and quiet may feel like a welcome change at first, but the solitude can creep in over time—making it even more important to stay connected and prioritise your mental wellbeing.
Lesson learnt from moving out:
“Bonding time: Now that I look back, I took this precious dinner time for granted. It was a great bonding time, even if we didn’t talk much. Seeing my parents being healthy and loving brings me comfort.” – @gohhomeliao on Lemon8
Consider these hard truths before you move out of your parents’ home
As much as moving out comes with a steep learning curve and a fair share of stressful moments, it’s also one of the most fulfilling life transitions that you’ll experience. The freedom to shape your own space—and the growth that comes from figuring things out on your own—can’t be taught, only experienced.
The mismatched furniture and the first grocery run that cost more than expected aside, these hard truths you’ll experience will eventually become stories you look back on with pride.
For more home guides:
- 10 HDB rules you should know to avoid flouting the law
- Post-renovation tips: 7 pesky things nobody tells you about finally moving in
- Top tips for renting alone in Singapore
Cover image adapted from: TheSmartLocal
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